Old fun Games memories

I find it funny

when some old games evolved,
not because the titles
but the memories of the story and my style of play.
HAAHAHA

When I found that it has Red Alert 3 (2009) in Dec 2018,
The first thing in my head was,

"I missed my Tanya ~~~~!!! "

and she never gets old. XD
She has the hair changed from black to brown to blonde XD

Info :
Tanya is the mercenary who allied Soviet as commando.

Why I SOOOoo remember her is because Tanya can
1. instant-kills infantries in longer range shoot.
2. soloed a TANK.
3. instant-boom building.

that's what made her the most iconic monster character who is a 1,000 vs 1 heroine in the war.

Her best friends are two Medic soldiers. 3 men 1 team can actually conquer enemy base.
Her worst enemy like every infantries is dogs. (dogs can instant-kill) or 1% chance being ran-over by tank, unless I mobilise 20 tanks in group and FORWARD.

=End=

In Red Alert 1,

What I like about the game is,
I torture infantry by ordering
1. him to charge towards Flame Tower ( shoots fires) and Tesla Coil ( shoots lightning beam)
2. him to the dogs
3. him to take down building (which take huge effort with bullets)

if it's the enemy's,
4. just RUN OVER HIM. (with a group of 20 tanks, sure won't miss one)

When I know I'm winning the game,
which is when enemy ran out of money, insufficient power plant (which I like to aim & destroy).
I will harvest all the money in the map, create silos, enjoy deploying infantries, medics, grenador, and tanks in relax.

Then, I will sell everything in my base (except the Command Center) and
use the remaining troops to charge the enemy base and eliminate every colour dots that remain in map. If it's an infantry, tanks retreat, I send a low hp infantry to PVP until he dies. If shooting no fun, I send K9. XD
Mission Accomplished!


Second is Tiberian Sun.
The name that I remember the most is Hassan (one of the Brotherhood of Nod Generals) with his pyramid hideout, I pitied his life because he is publicly executed in NOD. =w=lll

Third is Age of Empire
I like observing the civilians cutting trees, minings and construct buildings

I don't know but I like seeing how my troops die, continuing watching them decompose, turn to bones and eventually the natures absorb the corpses.

It was a horrible experience.
The sense of constant fear of people,
the anxiety of being seen or interacted with,
a burden failure.

I played games
to keep my mind busy,
away from mind-breaking.
I could play all day

Rewinding past and flashbacks
are mind-breaking
at such mental state

Vent or shu

I couldn't bring myself to accept the dirty world
that I just discovered. I was at struggled,
to find a way, answers to ease my condition,
to feel content

23th December 2018, Monday

Today's Dream


There's two teachers and a few classmates
spending the night in school campus.

The night covers the entire campus black.
I too, am preparing a spot to make my bed.
I went a bit far to fetch to shift some tables and chairs,
angered the spirit of the school of one classroom on a end corner.

I could sense things watching me,
and tagging me.
I grew fear on the unseen figure,
quickly dash back to the classroom
where the teachers and classmate were busying
unpacking their luggage.

One of the teachers didn't hear my plea,
told me to go to fetch some opposite the classroom instead,
I lift my heavy legs and enter the opposite classroom,
but I could hear the heavy breathe behind.

27th December 2018, Thursday

6.48am, I woke up from nightmare, then a sound of a thunder 'kuuuung~'

Today's Dream

26th December 2018, Wednesday - Today's Dream

Today's Dream

In recruitment,
arrive camp,
trainings.

As a new trainee,
sharing a dorm with
5-6 pax comrades.

We weren't so friendly, yet
we do all sort of training together,
calling each other with our strict faces,
because we do get punishment for late turn up.

One sunset,
we are preparing for another evening training before meal,
a few comrades went missing somewhere,
we try calling out them, but
there's no response this time.

The drill was cancelled.
and told to stay in dorm,
I was sweaty from the search,
so I decided to take a face wash.

There's a lot damaged toilets and shower rooms
in our dorm recently, which only one or two is usable.
I find the toilet we used to occupy is not working then.
I have to look out for the one on the corridor with shower rooms.

I went in to one,
the toilet seemed fine,
just the lights not working,
and the walls is grey and dim.

I got out when comrades calling me,
walking towards the door lights
continue to look for our missing comrades.

Yuumei the artist

26th December 2018, Wednesday

When I was doing some research on reference and samples picture on the internet for my freelance work today, I came across with this amazing illustrationist nicknamed Yuumei.

I find her arts very pure and original. Fantasy and nature.

Negativity. If You don't want to be put down, Skip this post.

I always think negative all the time just about everything,
I don't know whether it has an affection to do with
how I am brought up, being told
" No this, no that, DON'T, STOP, LISTEN "
Those words didn't shape me stronger,
but mentally weaken my desire, my dream
to do what I like to be,
to be who I want to be.

What the world needs is intelligent-s and problem-solvers,
not hard-workers, I'm none of all of them.
I am so afraid of my future.
Like everyone else, I fear insecurity in
abilities, finances and people..

Because I am weak, that's how I built up a habit
to blame everyone, and mostly myself
for bringing up a failure to this highly competitive world
who couldn't support own family or myself..

I am so hungry about honing skills and learning new skills,
Having self-doubt whether I could master this and that,
always gets in the way, putting me down of so called un-motivation..

I like keeping reference books and collecting flyers on an art table, to remind myself that I love sketching arts, own one-shot mangas and a graphic designer.

But I'm always lost in thoughts and skills,
doubting my qualifications..

I am a Ragnarok Online Player

TalonRO

I have been playing Ragnarok Online on and off.
I'm not a MVP or PVP or WOE player
and I don't belong to any guild.

I used to join party in Abbey,
a favourite place to level up
for players who are Lvl89-99
I did joined a MVP/WOE Guild
named Samhain, and leader named Kay
in one server 10 years ago.
that was hell fun hunting MVPs
still I appeared the quiet member
although I'm online.

Unfortunately,
the server closed down.
Most members later joined
a new game called the League of Legends
and other RO servers while I switched to
multiple servers myself to find a place a home.

I had tried a few servers andI found
TalonRO is the most favour of all
I called it home.

I always play solo,
from leveling to hunting
and doing quests
with Assassin class.

Making great deal of zeny nor purchase isn't my best ability.
I worked hard to make 

Record - 3 Movies a Day

Ever since GSC has became counterless,
I don't have to be shy away
to "declare" I'm single
in front of the cashier.

Technology has advances.
Many places has staff
replaced by kiosk machines
such as Mc Donalds in KLCC, Intermark Mall
and now GSC in Mid Valley, KL.
That also means more jobless on the rise..

With these kiosk machines,
I can browse movies on screen,
select my own seats and time,
purchase my own movie tickets,
using cash with return cash balance
or by credit card.

I don't have to be in a loooong queue
surrounded by people pushing me from the back,
or being asked "How many person?"
embarrassing question.

This system has becomes
convenient for a quiet person
like me,

well..
as long as I have money.

I know it's a special day,
but a moody day for me
to wander the entire day
in the cinema.

For the record,
11.30am - Mortal Engines
3.35pm - Spider Man - in Verse of Spiders
6.15pm - Ralph The Internet It Wreak

Yes,
my eyes is tiring from
concentrating on the bright,
fast-moving screen.

My ears is tolerating the
sounds in the closed doors.

My heart pumping from the climates,
energy-drains from following the stories
and still draining from deep thoughts
even the movies end.

Well,
I probably not gonna do that again.