If my carelessness goes 3 more inches further, I would be sent to hospital. Still in lucky piece, continuing the working day,

The Sims 4

Yes, having to play one of the latest games, I'm considerate fortunate even though I never had PS in my life. I do play Sims 3, I have it quite some time ago... 2014 I mean.

My laptop, Scholar wasn't supportive to meet the play requirement, not until I finally bought a budget gaming laptop, Hectar. It's sad that two brothers only met once and wave hand saying "goodbye"

Welcome Hectar, the Sims 3 is revived ! And I even bought a few Expansion Packs.

It was only recently I tried the Sims 4 Demo, believe me it's awesome even it's for 48 hours of trial play.

 Yeap, they even have implement the famous sci-fi movie, Star Wars Costumes here. Although there may not much clothes to choose (requires alot from Expansion Packs), but thanks to the makers for I can finally create the first ever female character that truly match my taste.

Sims 4, create your own sim.
skinny, fit or fat, they give you detail of what exact size of boob or butt shape.
Creating a face of President Obama, Ali the legendary boxer, or Lucy Ricardo you like. 

and this one here.

Pretty like the Mood Mode replaced from Horoscopes as it gives different mood expression to Sims Not just that, different Mood Mode unlocks certain acts for a short period, I get the chance to experience the following Mood :
Happy
Sad
Tense
Uncomfortable
Focused
Inspired
Flirty
...etc

Realistic as it shows their body languages, actions and face expressions. That's the fun part, real.

A Gift for the 'Gift' 2

Here I am, for another gift

Nidaime Gundam Daishogun, my first ever chibi Gundam.

This structure is simple and easy to build, I have this done in less than 3 hours but still take time to make everything nice.

All I need is my finger, twist, assemble, done

Putting on stickers is a crucial part which may ruin the appearance of the model.

Aha, this Gundam can transform! From original plate mail to ...

Golden plate mail thus named Nidaime Gundam Daishogun

This is smiling.

It's also a gift, not for myself. I'm glad they like them. ^w^

A Gift for the 'Gift' 1

7th October 2015, Wednesday

Brother's birthday is two days away, it was a month before that I thought of giving brother a present. Today I finally had decided. I'm not sure whether he likes its completion or he has the time to do, I'm going to do it.

I may not watch, but I like how complexity they are.

Gundam Transient

 Waste no time to start building, it's good that this one comes with Gundam Action Base (stand) unlike others have to buy separately.

Why?
When I recalled my brother has a clean white study table, I pick this type from the shelf.
Clean, and shinning blue.

Lower part leg - before.

 Lower part leg - after.

Thigh

The head - Before

 The head - After

The Arm - Before and after

 Friday, the birthday.
I had a hard time of completing today's work, very long story. I had bad headache from skipping meals and less water outside.

It gone down after shower. I resume to finishing it.

Time complete : 3.03am, 10th October 2015.

The basic completion (without pen-lining and spray)

Back into the box

Wrap with present paper.

Dream still Far Away

A housemate who works as a Modeler in a Korean company for about 3 months probation now. From what I notice he kept himself in his room modeling works even on weekends. He is a natural challenger with great diligent spirits which inspires me.

Being a Modeler takes a lot of patience of perfectly create one shape, be it an object of living organisms or fantasies. 

I have to catch up my going-dream as well.

Share, Read and Analyze about our History of Malaysia

The True History of Chinese and Indians in Malaysia
by mi1

RPK

A confusion has erupted due to ignorance. It has been stated that the Indians came here as beggars and the Chinese as prostitutes. Actually, if you were to really study Malayan and Malaysian history over the last 500 years or so, you will find that this country’s history is not just about beggars and prostitutes. It is about much more than that.

Malayan history has to be dissected into many periods. And each of these periods saw immigration involving almost all the races in Malaysia, save the Orang Asli (the Original People). In New Zealand, these Orang Asli would be the Maoris and in Australia the Aborigines. Therefore, anyone who is neither a Maori nor an Aborigine is a ‘pendatang’ or immigrant.

THE ARABS IN MALAYSIA

The Arabs and the Indians (Muslims from Gujarat) came to Malaya more than 500 years ago as traders and merchants. These were the people who brought Islam to this country. At that time, the locals were mostly Hindus while those from Negeri Sembilan were Buddhists, plus many who worshipped trees, the sea, rivers, mountains and whatnot. The coming of the Arab and Indian merchants exposed the locals to Islam.

In those days, the people followed their Rulers. Therefore, when the Rulers converted to Islam the people followed – although they may not have believed in Islam or understood the religion. In fact, many till today still do not understand Islam after more than 500 years.

THE CHINESE IN MALAYSIA

Then along came the Chinese and many were actually Muslims as well. Islam first reached China around 100 years after Prophet Muhammad. This means Islam had ‘migrated’ to China about 1,300 to 1,400 years ago, 800 to 900 years earlier than Islam in Malaysia. Of course, in the northern states bordering Thailand it was earlier than that. (Refer to the Batu Bersurat discovered in Kuala Berang in Terengganu).

Is it not ironical that Malays call Chinese Muslims ‘mualaf’ when the Chinese were Muslims almost 1,000 years before the Malays even heard of Islam?

Okay, now take my family as an example. The Selangor Sultanate was founded in 1745. The first Sultan, Raja Lumu, migrated here from the Riau islands in Indonesia. By then, of course, the Arabs, Indians and Chinese had already been here 200 to 300 years, some even longer.

But these Arabs, Indians and Chinese were traders and merchants, not warriors or fighters, whereas the Bugis from Riau only knew one occupation – fighting and plundering. In short, they were pirates, which was a noble profession back in those days where even Queen Elizabeth the First knighted those English pirates who plundered Spanish ships.

In fact, the Bugis came here because of a sort of civil war in their home country. There was a fight over a girl and the son of the local Ruler was killed in that fight. So the offending party was exiled and had to leave Riau. And that was when they came here in the 1700s and founded the Selangor Sultanate.

Do not members of the Selangor Royal Family fighting with their Ruler and going into exile sound very familiar to you? Yes, 300 years ago this was the ‘tradition’ and still is in my case.

Invariably, the Bugis, being fighters, took Selangor as their territory by the sheer force of its ‘army’. None of the traders, who although were here earlier, would dare resist the Bugis who enjoyed killing (some Bugis still do today, as you may well be aware). But Selangor was under Perak patronage.

So Raja Lumu had to make a trip to Lumut in Perak to get crowned as the First Sultan by the then 17th or so Sultan of Perak. (Can’t remember if it was the 15th or 17th but it was around that). And he took the name of Sultan Salehuddin Shah.

Selangor eventually grew in prosperity. Actually, tin had already been discovered even before Raja Lumu became Sultan in 1745. And it was the Chinese who were working the tin mines. But now, since Selangor had a ‘government’, all the land in Selangor became ‘state property’. And therefore the Chinese had to get permission from the Sultan before they could mine for tin.

Around 100 years later, only when Sultan Abdul Samad took over as the Fourth Sultan of Selangor in 1859 (he was born in 1804) did they properly organize the tin industry. New areas were opened up in Ampang, Rawang, Kajang, and whatnot. And of course, all these tin mines were owned by the Sultan and members of his family — brothers, sons, nephews, etc.

The Malays, however, did not want to work those mines. Conditions were hard and diseases wiped out entire communities. Those who survived these brutal conditions were the exception rather than the rule. So they needed people who were desperate enough to work those tin mines and were prepared to take the risk and probably lose the ‘gamble’.

And who else to talk to if not the Chinese who had already been working those mines for hundreds of years?

So members of the Selangor Royal Family went into ‘joint venture’ with the Chinese, just like they did in Perak, another rich tin state. The Malay Royals would ‘arrange’ for the tin concessions and the Chinese would provide the labour force to work those concessions. In a way, you could say that the Selangor Royal Family were the first to ‘invent’ the Ali Baba system back in the 1800s, long before the New Economic Policy in 1970.

Anyway, to reach Ampang and those other surrounding rich tin areas, they had to travel up the Klang River. Raja Abdullah and Yap Ah Loy led the first expedition and they landed on the site where the Gombak River and Kelang River meet. The place where they landed is the site of the famous Masjid Jamek in Kuala Lumpur.

From there they marched overland through the jungle into Ampang. And thereafter Kuala Lumpur was never the same again. It prospered and continued to prosper over more than 200 years from the 1800s.

Yap Ah Loy bought up a lot of land in Kuala Lumpur and built his business empire. He opened bars, brothels and all sorts of businesses, legal as well as illegal (illegal by today’s standards though). Even the British Colonial ‘masters’ would patronise Yap Ah Loy’s brothels to sample the latest ‘China Dolls’ brought in from the mainland.

Of course, the normal customers would have to pay for these vices. The British masters, however, could enjoy all these services for free. Yes, even back in the 1800s the Chinese businessmen were already bribing the government officials.

Now, while Yap Ah Loy has been entered into the history books as the ‘Founder of Kuala Lumpur’, Raja Abdullah is never mentioned. The only thing associated with Raja Abdullah is that road in Kampong Baru that carries his name. Yap Ah Loy may have been the capitalist who opened up Kuala Lumpur.

But he was only able to do so because he had a ‘sleeping’ partner, Raja Abdullah, who gave him all this land to develop.

Okay, that is the Chinese story. So, yes, some did come here as prostitutes working for Yap Ah Loy. But that was incidental. Whenever frontier land is opened up the girls servicing these frontier-men follow – like in the Wild West of America. Would you say that the White immigrants to America were all prostitutes?

THE INDIANS IN MALAYSIA

Now, over to the Indians. As I said, the Indian (and Arab) traders and merchants first came here more than 500 years ago and even brought Islam to this country. But the ‘other’ Indians, the workers, came at about the time that Yap Ah Loy and Raja Abdullah were turning Kuala Lumpur into a thriving metropolis.

At that time, the British planters were in Ceylon (Sri Lanka today) growing cocoa. Then a plant disease spread throughout the island and all the trees died. But this disease not only killed all the trees but contaminated the land as well. This means the land was now useless and it was not a matter of just replanting.

Then the British looked at Malaya and decided that the conditions (land, climate, etc.) in Malaya were the same as in Ceylon. So they relocated their cocoa estates to Malaya. But there was no way they could get the Malays to work these cocoa estates. Furthermore, the Ceylonese workers were well trained and had been doing this work for years.

So, in the mid-1800s, the British brought the now unemployed Ceylonese cocoa workers to this country to work the Malayan cocoa plantations.

Then disaster struck. Brazil over-planted cocoa and this triggered a worldwide glut. It was no longer economical to plant cocoa. The price you would fetch for your cocoa was lower than your production cost. The British had no choice but to close down the cocoa plantations.

Around that time, the British, who had mischievously smuggled rubber seeds out of Brazil (which was a crime then), successfully grew rubber trees in the Kew Gardens in London. They also did some research and discovered a better way of planting rubber trees where the trees would give a better yield compared to the trees in Brazil. Rubber planting in Brazil was haphazard and not properly organized.

Since Malaya had to close down all its cocoa plantations and it now had idle plantation land and surplus Ceylonese workers, the British planters decided to switch over to rubber. And because the British took advantage of research and technology, the Malayan rubber trees were more productive and profitable. Eventually, Malaya dislodged Brazil as the top rubber producer in the world.

So, from the mid-1800s to around 1920, Indians and Chinese came to Malaya in great numbers. This was more or less the second wave of mass migration. And it was for economic reasons and to provide the labour for jobs that the Malays would never do. But there were earlier and other migrations as well.

For example, around the late 1800s and early 1900s, the British set up English medium schools for Malays. One such school, the Malay College Kuala Kangsar, was a school exclusive for sons of Royalty and the Malay elite. Invariably, they needed schoolteachers who were proficient in the English language. And India offered a good source of English medium schoolteachers (Malays could not speak English yet at that time).

On the commercial side, there were many Indian businesses, workers and whatnot. But there was no way they could qualify for loans from British owned banks. So the Indians from the Chettiar community came here to set up money-lending businesses to service their community.

When the Malayan rail network was being developed, where else to get the workers if not from the country with the largest railway in the world, India?

WE ARE ALL MALAYSIANS

 GAME : Life is Strange

Honestly, I felt nausea at the start of this game. Normally I suck with moving screens, the next thing you would expect me, is end up at toilet bowl, but this one, it's friendly at least less nausea.

The story is kind of cool about what activities that western people do in high school life. I'm actually enjoying reading all the conversations and to understand more about the storyline and characters around.

This is a 5 Episode game, based on the actions I choose, which will impact in the following stories as it goes, with different dialogues, actions, feelings or fate between characters and even with different endings. The plot is broad wide, it's like every conversations can make a clue out of it, if you missed out one, you could miss out important sub-message. SO, don't feel guilty for being nosy in this game =w=

Seriously, every actions makes my mind blows up for thinking which action TO CHOOSE to have a HAPPY ENDING !! Who likes sad ending anyway?

It's an old school theme graphic, I like the plot, hilarious. If you haven't play it, I recommend to try !

I have played 4 Episodes so far, things were gotten deeper and more confused to find out in the last episode, I can't wait for the last episode to air to play the ending (coming on mid October 2015) . Rather not waste, I made myself a game note of what will the ending be, just my theory.

First off, I will focus on certain characters that might appear or related. Just something I share here, if you never play this game, it did be a spoiler.




My angle on certain characters :

A) Rachel Amber
- A Blackwell student, not a Vortex Club member.
- Dreams to be a super model.
- Hang outs with Chloe and the skateboard students.

How she met Frank Bower?
She told Chloe she met someone who can change her life, which is Frank Bower.
Or getting quick-money to Los Angeles with Frank or Chloe?
Or helping to deal drugs just want to pay Chloe's debt?

Disappeared 6 months ago.


Little did I know about Rachel Amber,
will that explain more in Episode 5 (Last) ?




B) David Madsen
1) Present dimension (Mr.Price dead from accident)
- Chloe's step-father in the present.
- He was a soldier, 'was'... why?
- Now a Head security guard of Blackwell School
(was he assigned on a mission to research Blackwell School about Prescott?)

- A comrade with other police officers but wasn't friendly with him.
- put the house under survellience, for the purpose of protection?
- Keeping secret files, of Kate and Rachel,
on top of all he must some traces about Prescott family and Mr. Jefferson.

2) Virtual dimension (Mr.Price alived)
- Retired soldier, he's a school bus driver, friendlier.

But is he still working on secret files?


C) Kate Marsh
Kate was drugged at a Vortex Club party,
telling Max that Nathan took her to an unknown place
which she describes as white room like a hospital, but in fact the Dark Room

A file document contained Kate's dosed photo.

If Kate is alive
she might have big help in rescuing Max with David in the Episode 5 (Last)

Kate's suicide,
Led unrest

D) Chloe Price
1) Present dimension (Mr.Price dead from accident)
- A drop-out school
- Good in driving
- debts

2) Virtual dimension (Mr.Price alived)
- Paralyzed and respiratory failure from car accident.
- A total opposite personality.
- She said a Chinese proverb,
"A spark can start a fire that burns the entire prairie."
You know, like that butterfly thing...

(what does that have to do with butterfly?
Later found a blue butterfly drawing in Chloe's room, Max said it's a total coincidence)

So that proves Chloe's spirit insect is blue butterfly,
yet it appears in the bathroom in the Present Dimension,
for unknown reason.

Does Chloe knows she will be dead, turning into blue butterfly going back
to the bathroom time to tell Max? So that Max can scares Nathan out,
explain the time's Chloe to take David and the principal to Rachel's body
and later the Dark Room?


Charges Nathan and Mr. Jefferson for Kate's viral video to bring justice?


E)Warren
- A geek and scientist
- has crush on Max
- beats Nathan for Kate, for Max, for himself.
- gets drunk in the Vortex's 'End of The World' party,
was it to immobilize him from tailing / sticking his nose?
Or he felt down being ditched?
Or did he felt guilty about something?

Wait.. He invited Brooke to "Go Ape" movie and ride earlier, why would he be sad?
Shouldn't he be with Brooke chit-chating at the party, why drunk alone?

Max and Chloe didn't want Warren to be involved for his safety.


Photo
Possible to travel back to
A) Butterfly photo (taken from washroom)
After hitting the fire alarm, report to the principal
of Mr. Jefferson about murder connection of :
1) Rachel's death
2) Kate's fate (viral video / photo)
3) Dark Room.
However, there's no proof of Mr. Jefferson's doing and Nathan behind.

B) Chloe and Rachel group photo (from Chloe's secret box)
To safe Rachel Amber, travel back to warn them of Rachel's danger.

C) Max and Chloe group photo (young age)
After knowing what had happened in the other dimension,
Chloe had a car accident, paralyzed and respiratory failure.

Max burns the photo in the fireplace as a final decision of no turning back.
Before Max was to go back to the present,
she told Chloe she will still be with her even if she's not present.
I wonder if this has slightly changes in the present Chloe.

D) Max and Warren group photo
(Episode 4) Taken at the school campus before Max and Chloe
read a threaten message from 'Nathan' that he's going to dispose evidence.

Was it really texted by Nathan?

It was Mr. Jefferson's set trap to lure them out of surveillance campus in a motive
to kill them.

If Max can go back to that time and warn Chloe of that false message,
they would not driving out of campus and caused Chloe dead.
Moreover, Max could ask Warren to call the police/David.
Max and Chloe will straight confront Mr. Jefferson at the party.

But that wouldn't change of the tornado arriving the following day.
How will Max save Arcadia Bay?

Spirit animal
A. Doe

Max sees the spirit doe in her 'nightmare' vision, which leads her :

1) to the lighthouse, discovering the date of the tornado.
2) to find Rachel, unfortunately, the body in Chloe's secret hideout (junkyard).

(Episode 1) A real doe is at the lighthouse hill. Are they the same/related?

(Episode 4) The spirit doe watches Max and Chloe after finding Rachel's body at the junkyard
it then bows down and disappeared. Could this be Rachel's spirit animal?
Or could this be William Price, Chloe's late father spirit animal?

AND, Max been wearing t-shirts that has a doe picture in it. Coincidence?
So... What's Max's spirit animal?

B. Snow doe
Appears in both Max's dimension has in Chloe's house:

1) Present dimension (Mr.Price dead from accident)
(Episode 1) in Chloe's room, placed on top cabinet when Max first explore Chloe's room.
OPTION : Max rewind to avoid breaking it.

(Episode 4) Appears in Chloe's blue table.

2) Virtual dimension (Mr.Price alived)
(Episode 4) in Chloe's room, with more snowing bowls.
Chloe never knew Rachel Amber except knowing her disappearance in news.

So... does snow doe and the spirit doe related?

C. Squirrel
Samuel's spirit animal.

He seems to know a lot about Rachel Amber and the Prescott's doing,
but never spoken about Mr. Jefferson.
when Max first spoke to him outside the girls' dormitory.

(Episode 4) At the Barn, a squirrel leads Max to the door.
It's like Samuel know something, and is helping them to discover the Dark Room.

D. Blue Butterfly
It appears in the washroom, I bet it's no coincidence. Question is, why?
Who does this spirit insect belong to?

I have this in mind, Chloe.
Just the same as the doe leads them to Rachel's body;
The blue butterfly leads Max to save Chloe.

But why the doe didn't lead Max to save Rachel before she was killed?
Was it too late? Or no way to turn back to past?

Virtual dimension (Mr.Price alived)
(Episode 4) A drawing of blue butterfuly appears in Chloe's actual room.
Is this a coincidence? Or does this telling me it's Chloe's spirit animal/insect?

E. Owl
Secretive and spooky

From others theory, owl is like the presence of Mr.Jefferson,
assuming to be his spirit animal:

Owl tantum is watching the dormitory.
Does this has anything related to Mr.Jefferson always watching every move
and searching his next target on his photo art?

(Episode 4) inside the barn and the night in the junkyard when it flew by
before ending with Mr. Jefferson drugged Max and shot Chloe,
begging for mercy in the Dark Room, Mr. Jefferson once filling a needle shot.

F. Whale
Nathan Prescott's animal spirit. When sneak in Nathan's room, Max play his speaker,
voice of whale can be heard.



As some of the gamer's theories mentioned about 

A) Rachel Amber's body in plastic bag buried in junkyard, is not 100% sure if it's hers, it can possibly be other victims. (For me, if it wasn't hers.. why would a spirit doe watching them when the girls found the body and gave a sad bow, disappears after? Plus, why would Mr. Jefferson chose not to disarm Chloe but killed her on the spot?)

So, Rachel Amber is dead.

Nathan Prescott knows Amber Rachel in the Dark Room, his jacket was found in the Dark Room, more like he's shocked about seeing her (found a drawing from principal's computer file wrote "Rachel in the Dark Room over and over", somebody must have shown him of his devil photography, Mr.Jefferson... I assumed)


B) Sean Prescott, Nathan's father is Mark Jefferson himself. I agreed too, no one ever seen Sean Prescott in person except in the Dark Room, I found letters of Nathan written by Sean Prescott, the details was about the father angry over Nathan for using his phone calling to him and screamed his name in the public. Suspicious and doubt he is Mark Jefferson.

Students around mentioned Sean Prescott sponsored the bar and deejays at "The End of The World" Vortex Club party. Mark Jefferson even shows up to announce the photo contest winner, which most would hold during assembly hall.. I don't know if I'm stupid or smart, I even snap as many shots of Mark Jefferson and compare characteristic of Nathan, and father and son picture in Nathan's room.

They do look alike, try put Nathan with glasses =w= unless he looks like mother.



It may have very difficult option to choose for different endings, so this is My Theory of Possibility :

Chloe was shot dead, Max was dosed, only Mr.Jefferson is revealed.  The last scene in the Dark Room, a desperate voice of a girl (who is it? Max? or Rachel still alive? or a past scene?) comes with Mr. Jefferson filling some dope to a syringe.

So, what happen next?

 Any question will reveal on the Episode 5 (Last)
Okay, we found out Mr.Jefferson is behind the missing Rachel Amber and poor Kate Marsh. Since Max knows the secret, she will either ends with the fate like all the missing people in Arcadia Bay or successfully escape.

In the Dark Room, possible to have Nathan and Mark Jefferson with, so there may be some more conversation to explain more about Nathan whether being involved with or he's innocent and regrets, could lead to free Max from captive.

Obviously, Max will escape the ill-fated, if not there wouldn't be a long story ahead.

If Max is conscious, she could use her powers to rewind, but how many hours has passed then? So, this could be impossible.

If she's still weak from the dose, the only thing she probably could undo back to the past is find any possible photos to Jump-Travel to save herself and Chloe. BUT, wait... even if she Jump-Travels to change the past, she still be Jump back to present, is that right? or it wasn't? Anyway, will she be blindfolded?

Will there be a possibly of rescue team to save Max?
 If Max is saved, she may ended up like Kate with viral videos and dropped out of school? No no

Will there be a possibility of discover more about her power?



What happen in the Dark Room?
1) Will Max face her fate just like Rachel Amber?
2) Will Max ever have the chance to conscious-wake and rewind?
- Will there be any photos around for Max to rewind to undo everything?
As far as saving Rachel Amber? and know how to stop the tornado on 11th October?
-

3) What can be known about tornado from Mr.Jefferson?
This whole serial killer doesn't has relation with
the tornado going to wipe up Arcadia Bay, right...?

About William's accident.. does that ends without why?

The gun rack of David's, another gun was missing.
Is it David armed or Mr. Jefferson stole it, use it to kill Chloe and trying to put David at fault?

Will David discovers Chloe's room, call police and rescue Max?

Why would Max appears in vision,
watching Arcadia Bay to be destroyed by tornado at the lighthouse?

About saving Arcadia Bay from tornado, is a natural disaster due to climate change.
But what if it's the power of Max
great disturbed the time cycle of tornado which should happens once every 20 years
in Arcadia Bay has shorten to 5 years?

OR
does Max's power isn't just about rewind time that simple?
Can Max able to travel back to find out about Pan Estate
(might be the cause of climate change) and destroy it?

When Kate jumps, Max was able to pause the time and got to the rooftop to talk Kate off.

But the ending, 
Max will probably die with internal brain injuries from overusing her power, leaving Chloe alone again (if she's alive), maybe she turns over a new leaf, and continue to live on for Max or she was be tossed with that 'gift to bring back Max?

Borneo

10 days break, it's like 3 days just passed.

Security Guard? I'm stranger.

Fresh air.

Beautiful night sky.

Not familiar with the kitchen.

 Slow, unstable internet, normal.

Problems with washing machine? If I ask "why not let me change a new one?" 100% sure she would oppose the idea, and yea... she did, without me speaking.

Bersih? I joined, very disappointed.

The truth about me here, hanging out myself with the nature.

I ate tarap and durian. That's it. Fly to KL.

KL? Home shit home..

1 month and 4 days after moving to a new room unit. Not that I can say I'm used to it, especially my next room housemate always has a habit of banging door even after midnight.

Having quite a nightmares on the first 3 weeks, forgotten about keys, and grasping for durian and tarap.

Few days later I will be on another island, Borneo.

8th August 2015 (Saturday)

8th August 2015, Saturday

I Had a little accident during shopping utensil. I got little scratch from a falling peeler.

No choice but to buy plaster. 100 strips ?! Looks like I don't have to worry about running out in the next 5 years. XD

 

 

A little scratch cut can be fixed with a plaster, nothing than being called a "bitch" by a dude I cross-path earlier, well thanks.. hope your girlfriend breaks up with you soon.

16 July 2015, Thursday Night

遇上三位无名氏，两男一女在店路上，停我要做问卷调查。
我看了看问卷，明显是他们的宗教问答题，
我就问， “这不是一般性人会答的问题啊，我不是，怎么会做答呢？”
在他们的劝呼，我只好下笔。

总共7个选择题，我可以说我只会答第一道问题 “Are you a _________? If you are not, what's yours？” 类似意思， 当然，我写出我的宗教。

接下来的6个选择题，我能说这些问题很脑筋转动性， 要选但答案又不是答出我心中的意思，产生不服， 如果当年意志力弱的我就很容易击倒。所以A B C D / 1 2 3 4 要选哪个答案，都不在我眼上，我的答案就是 E/ 5 （自己写）。

做问答当中，他们也有不断和我聊，
“你不像这里人（KL），哪里来？”
“东马，”

“你有去过________吗？”
我坦白说 ： “有，当时跟组做学院功课，我配合她待下，所以——”
聊得百分百都是关于他们宗教性的问题，要不是刻意题。
“你去了多久？”
“整整都有三个月多，”他们脸上都有露出一种满意感
后来问起我的宗教相关问题时，我个人感觉上他们在看低我，（这个问题也不是第一个同样宗教人问我）
我什么教，少去拜，不代表我不忠心，为什么总是用那种眼神看我？

有一个口声问我，“你信不信科学？”
我心想怎么他问的问题这么奇怪？只有我学校没教科学吗？还是他觉得东马没有科学这门科目？
“信啊，”

其实，这是他要说的下一句， “科学证明了 ___ ，不管什么宗教任何人都可以阅，” 我给他的反应是，否定。不管真假，都让我浮出疑问 ‘ 为什么说到他们的宗教将 ‘科学’ 性呢？还要用科学证明什么？他们的宗教存在性吗？！难道所有宗教或宗教书 '没有科学证明' 就不能相信吗？ 真不科学！’

之后，他还想要一再而再度要我看5分钟的影片段。如果科学证明了的，那全世界人都 会在最名的网站看他所指的 影片，我猜疑他说的话，我就问 “Youtube 有吧？”
他没有回答我，“你自己看会不明白，我能帮你解释” ，那——明白了。

我帮他们做问卷调查时间都不短，我还是刚放工，整理厨房，到外购物抽满东西要回去做很晚的晚餐。 他们的人性真是简单。。。自私，还想抓紧机会传教。好好的一个宗教信仰，为什么要把你们的宗教变得将逼性，将生意化，有commission 吗？真是破坏你们自己宗教的名誉。

最后，我抓紧我的人权，两度拒绝，饿着肚子继续往街爬回去。

人可以有没有宗教，但不可以没有道德和理性。

Locked Inside and Out

15th July 2015, Wednesday

SOmetimes, anyone would make mistake in life... I made my mistake on my starting first day of being locked outside my room and stuck in the living room, not able to go out the unit.

I was about to go to work, when I realised I have left my keys..

I searched every thing I could use to make as tools to unlock my door room and all failed. I knew there's a housemate in the house, but I didn't want to disturb him for ask for help until I tried my best.

When the housemate finally going out the house, that's my time's out... I went out with him to look for key shop to duplicate my keys and ask for unlock door service.

The shop I went cost me RM12 just for two duplicated keys... and RM50 for unlock door service... I couldn't wait till sunset, I got to pay that mistake that I had carelessly made..

Moving Room

Moving to a new zone, the atmosphere is sad for me, because there's no sunlight coming through my windows and the room is filled with confinements. The only thing catches my glimpse is the curtain of Doraemon from the opposite unit of hope..

Sound of Muslim prayers can be heard clearer than my old zone. I don't know how exactly sanity will drive me by staying there.



11th July 2015 (Saturday) - 4.30pm, Day 5

I carry, I sweat, I don't rely.

I got almost everything ready.

I don't look happy here, is enjoying what's gonna do next.

I have no one to depend on, life has to be that way. To live it comfort, I must make my nest as comfortable as possible. Whenever I tired, I may at least have a bed to comfy my soul to lay rest and table to my laptop. That's the most basic most people need.

12th July 2015, Sunday
Waking up almost noon.. laying on mattress, looking up the ceiling, I had a dream of her and her cousins. That attention draws me to miss my b, my destination is just a short distance.I run and run and run until I reach the hill. Watching over the sunsets, is later joined by her and her cousins.

Unwilling to get up, it ends without remembering the rest, just upset me. The warm sun, this could be my second last to see the sunlight shine through my windows.

My new room is on the 6th floor, so it's impossible to see the sunlight from the window, which means depending on the electricity the only way. 

 What's left in my current room, a mattress, laptop, and remaining clothes. I couldn't remember how many times I move my stuffs from Block A to Block B, all by my own. Definitely a solo task, but that proved my strength, patience and spirit that I can, I can make myself a pleasant stay.

2015年7月7日， 星期二

曾小亮：要不要強迫更多中國名人出櫃？| 荷蘭在線 

有人曾经数年责骂过我的衣着 ：
“又穿那件裤子！松松波波大大的，穿得不男不女，怎样看都是女生，你想骗别人的眼视吗？！
男生女生看到你（的装扮）会怎样？看得都讨厌、很恶心，叫我怎么跟你出街走在一起？！
像妖怪一样！
遇到熟人要我介绍‘这是我儿子’还是‘女儿’？ 要我出丑吗？！
你不用出了，diu sai ngo min!”

当时青少年的我无力反抗，也无法解释自己的心态
“为什么。。。？”




十一年后的现在，我突然回想起了这个问题。眼朝看着天花板，板中的白色出现黑墨，脑袋浮现了以下：

发育时期，
男生健身、潮流发型，打扮英俊为了打造自信，寻伴；
女生化妆打扮漂亮、斯文也都为了吸引男生的注目寻伴

同样的我，跟一般人一样，打扮，造型，也是为了有机会在亿人之中能引起那位的注目，碰触我的手， “接我” 为伴。

22 June 2015 - Monday, It's not blue, it's blur

22 June 2015, Monday

Bus in the late morning, I don't feel like getting up but I can hear my alarms 3 times this time,
1. 5.30am
2. 7.30am
3. 8.15am

Feeling sleepy, I don't remember my dreams, was it too many, too blur.

I sat on the second row on the right. A couple were in the first row. A girl took out her phone to take a selfie with her sleeping boyfriend. The glancing of the girl in that phone, I shied away, to the window, now I know why I don't do selfie, as I easily get emotional. I just look away.. with tear barely to hold..

I don't like working today..slow walk in the mall, wander like a lost soul,  arrive office an hour late.

16th June 2015 - Close to dead, But not dead

16th June 2015, Tuesday
I received a special task from senior colleague about a sad incident which is today I will be in-charge of making helium balloons for funeral held on 18th June 2015, Thursday.

It happens to be one of our known customer and daughter, a member who died from that car accident, the daughter and the father while two injured and treated in hospital. The little girl was three years old... she likes pink balloons.

With  my volunteer team, Sabrina, Joe, and Jane, we work off 40 helium  balloons to be collected by 4.00pm.

Manage to pump 25 helium balloons before our gas tank ran out of gas. Searching for out source helium gas service around the mall, one of my mate suggested to try at S&J outlet. so Joe and I went down. However, there's no service available, glad that the staff direct us to Memory Lane outlet.

15 for RM60, It's expensive... but, Joe shares his potion with me, we successfully complete the special task before finishing time. Three cars arrived, receiving the balloons at ground floor. "Thank you very much of your help.." they said.

Day two,
Teamed with Jane, last 20 balloons is ready for Thursday at 10.00am. Total 60 helium balloons with 35 outsourced helium gas and 36 balloon rings cannot be claimed from company.. and I knew along.

The longer I live, the more I see people leaves... The Earth still moving, Lives still going

Rest In Peace..

 18th June 2015, Thursday
The balloons weren't okay when helium gas was too strong to break free, ends up leaking within a day. I only came to know in the morning before second collection, The remaining 20 balloons that we pumped were not in good condition, I fetched up another RM80 to redo again before the car pool arrives.

Teamed with Sabrina, in less than 30 minutes time, 20 more new balloons filled, return outlet, tried our best tying the rest, and send to the car.

( Picture taken by anonymous ) . After the wake funeral on Thursday morning.

( Picture taken by anonymous )

( Picture taken by anonymous )

Cloud gathers, Rain showers, Earth absorbs, that's life..

13 June 2015 - It's Not A Fault

Waking up with tears roll down the chin hoping those dreams I dreamt were true..  Looking down on my empty hand, asking myself just how far my future can go without the slightly hope from the eyes of people but pity look and discriminate sight .. everyday..

Does killing myself the only way to free from hurting more?

But,

25 May 2015 - When Mom Never Stop Repeating

Mentally tortured, I want to close my eyes and leave quietly

25 May 2015 - Moving Out Soon

The unit is put on sale early this year, and a few buyers has already came viewing the unit mostly in my presence. some come in single, couple, and married family. I couldn't say whether it's annoying to be called to present in unit or not, the concern is when will the time's up for me to get ready to let go.

16th May 2015, Saturday, the house owner sent an officer to make a draft of the unit and informed me that the unit has been officially sold out to the new owner, and made a ... a blur message that all household are to move out on October 2015.

In immediate action without mother, I started survey for rooms mostly within the condominium hoping to look for a small room with reasonable price, fair environment, with standard needs. This eventually revealed a day after to mother, and I knew the next thing mom knows, she's gonna stick her nose and call the house owner for "a tea", just like the way I was in primary school... and help with the room survey..

24th May 2015, Sunday. Present day, the second week. I have viewed a few rooms by now. I started questioning myself, just how much monthly income is consider stable as most of the rooms be it a small or medium, all are a sum of money much higher than my current one, and it's hard setting my budget around RM330 - RM400 when all starts up from RM420 to RM550 price range.

Because of this matter, I first get to know of my housemates more better when I never talk much with them ever since I stay here. Unsocialize ? or I don't like giving out my information ?

What surprises me was, I came to know days ago that this unit was haunted, so that does make sense our rentals are much lower than many others. I have been staying here without knowing the story of this unit, and I'm glad nothing happen to all of us, especially me often staying alone in units during housemates holiday. Ah well, finding rooms and working performance are now a mentality training these months.

One of The Stupid Things To Do - 01

Never ever do office works with your computers, and definitely not continuous for long period.

Back in what's call comfort zone, the only electronics you call pleasure and relaxation has now symbolic of stress when works lied in hard disk, and no excuse of not finishing it.

Should I play game or finish the work ??

There's no resting soul at home. I want to quit this restless mind.

22 May 2015 - Sometimes I don't Get It.

Delaying of works.. one boss starting to question.

Maybe I slack off abit too often? Or is it that I cannot do well at work at all? Or is it the promises you made for clients a very short notice to us, to me ?

When I did fast, you complain the work not good, ugly (that hurts my pride and dignity) ; When I did slow, you complain about delaying works;  When I did right, you demand more creative features from your imaginations.. blur message of instructions and more amendments to be made, so things goes back to working slow again.

Whatever I did, I complete as many as I could with my two small hands, one brain and one soul.

The world is never perfect. In exchange of something, I get my freedom.

It did feel awesome to have freedom at the beginning of the journey. Full privacy, free directions, free wills ~ Things I never seen before, embracing that magnificent view, even a tiny little seashell, can write up a good remembrance that make my day.

During my mother's visit in April, she asked me  "Do you feel lonely..?"

Third Year

After spending a year working part time as a junior designer and freelance videographer and editor, I had made an unwilling decision to vacant in big city, Kuala Lumpur.

My first year on February, my mother found me a medium room, RM380 rent per month with two months deposit, I stayed in less than a month before switching into small room RM330 per month in the same unit, it was indeed lucky to get one. The guy from small room was returning to homeland, Sabah, my homeland-mate. He is the son of the manufacturer of local product, Ikan Bilis, and he's going back to work in his father's company.

Life starts in the medium room, there was nothing except my mattress, stuffs and luggage on the floor. I look for unused stuffs in That's the simplistic start of life.

I had a broadband with limited usage, I was unprepared to share wifi with housemates, for my first month. Reading Newspapers,watching videos and sketching was the only entertainment.

Often making myself meals, noodle with egg as meal is regular basis for the first six months.

 It does get tiring, sitting

 Switching the small room, doing the entire cleaning process from moving furnitures to reattach the double-decker bed and wash the suty walls.

Just simple as it is. No tables, just three-legged coffeetable.

Before he leaves, he parted with the local snack Ikan Bilis as gifts. How I love those sweet taste.

I turned down the first interview based in Shah Alam and dislocated working place and travel distance.

The second Interview was a success, however a tragic scam struck me hard on that day I receive my offer letter. Life just started, it taught me the first great lesson, and I know I got to struggle like a toddler learning how to stand up and move forward, thus starting the next day with "fresh account".

That lesson also taught me how to use the every penny I spent daily written in record book, time travel, accessible transports and monthly calculation of expenses.

2013 - 2015 , My years working in Kuala Lumpur, life is changing for the better in such a short period. Still, I hate living in a polluted city which aim only in business than greening environment.

 

Own a cooking pot to make own meals 

I have own free-living and full privacy. I have income, mom's & my savings and EPF. I have books and toys that I never had before, I have gadgets, electronics and games that I had always wanted but never had in my young age other than Chipsmore, twisties snacks as the least pleasure. Now I own almost every basic pleasure in my entire room without parents' hard earning money, that's the kind of level for a young working adult.

Carried my first F.O.C. table, wrapped surface.

 Found my second F.O.C. table at the dump side, Very good condition, wrapped surface.

  The snacks were my least pleasure

Own Toys that I never thought I could have before.

 Own 10 drawing books that I can't find in K.K.

Have colleagues sharing in one round table for lunch.

Presently, the house unit I live in is on sale, I don't know if there will be good news or bad news to the household if the unit are to be sold. We may or may not stay any longer. Whatever it comes, I will miss the double decker bed.

 

Own a new stand fan welcoming the hot season of the new year.

Now a messy room full of reusable junks and stuffs

The third year of working in the company, increment and bonus doesn't go to everyone fairly.... great men will lose their faith contributing the company when boss is ungrateful and stingy... I may have to look for a new job otherwise I may die working 5 companies' design works.

This year is a special year with special change, the GST... This finally pushed me to another decision-making of replacing my 5 years old laptop before April's Fool comes. Now it only worth RM420, a very sad amount, isn't it?

 The 5 years old buddy worth RM420 will end soon, for its honour, I gave it a name, Scholar. It's sad to let go.

Replacing with a gaming laptop Lenovo Y50, not the best like ASUS G551 that I wanted (out of stock because of GST) , it's an affordable budget gaming laptop so far. I named it, Hector.