Fault

Teaming up work with guys, they treated me lightly, think about money, gamble, sport games, bragging work and pride; grouping with girls, chit-chating, talking dress, cosmetics, boyfriends and complaints about work... ; my kind? I am more afraid to mix around with them, their lives or with their girlfriends, other than what we all share that kind of  fate life, many of them smoke and drink, and have long hours work and commitment that I hardly have the chance to ask them out, (asking out means spending more money), I just don't suit any side.

I probably don't know how to be a woman or a man other than be myself. The truth is, I'm confused when I don't know how long I can hold my sanity.

Just what the meaning of be myself in here anyway? Was it my unsocialized manner as fault?

Uncle John is my car tutor, and was my mother's fellow neighbour lived next door before I was born.

He was diagnosed with skin cancer two years ago due to overexposed to strong sunlight because of his job, during the time Ivy and I had our driving lessons. He taught well, and strict, he was once my mom's tutor too =w= so that car has my mom pictured memory in it.

I found out his health condition recently.. He has been hospitalized for almost half a year after an unsuccessful operation, the wounds have not been recovered and showed sign of rot, and further operations was made by attaching skin from the other parts of his body.

He had been revived twice back from the dead.. paralyzed and fed on oxygen tube and food. I was so emotionally sad about his struggles at old age.. I can't imagine how his wife, Aunty Lee felt all these time be in his side..

14th December 2014, Sunday - 2.39pm, I finally able to speak with him, I was happy to hear his voice, he told me to give my best on my job,  and I promised that I will give in. I wanted to see him.

Dye Hair

5th December 2014, Friday

I dye my hair at age 25 for the first time. Inexperience but fun. Now I still think my hair is black.

 Getting things ready, mirror wet tissues, elastic band

Open up and read instructions

Glad there's step by step for avatar like me.

 Let's take a photo of before. Clumsy hair ?

Applying the mixture

It took me quite few times to reapply in some parts, well it's my first try afterall there's no perfection.

Hmm, I think this colour tone is fine with me, not too yellow, later people think my head is yellow.

Companion

Camel Active shoes

Shoe is a companion, they go wherever you go, and protect your feet.

Such durable and sturdy cool looking shoes are hard to find for my size because they are made for men... unfair..

Searching new shoes for 3 days onwards, and this is the result.

Taipei Trip - 13th ~ 19th November 2014

Taipei Family Trip

Rao He and Xi Men Ding night markets full of Taiwan's specialty snack food, but don't get lost in the streets.

14th November 2014 (Friday)

Tapei Zoo

Lucky for mom to have close range with a gorilla photograph

Finally brother got a hold of a butterfly.

I at Penguin House

 15th November 2014 (Saturday)

The Respect

Mother meets her late father in Chi En Memorial Park.

16th & 7th November 2014 (Sunday, Monday)

Taking brunch with brother and mother in Jiufen

18th November 2014 (Monday)

Taipei 101

Brother and I stand tall at Taipei 101

The Meet

25th October 2014, Saturday

Whenever I feel lonely, I just sit quietly.
I dreamt about her in my sleep, that's the least I can to ease emotion

That long wait meet,
I stood just to watch her from a distance,
how long have I not seen her in person?
What should I say about..when the time she's heartbroken?

To her, that hug may not mean anything but greetings.
To me, it's warmth.

The meet was short,
Still, I wonder if she has something to tell me.

Yeah.. you are right.
I shouldn't stop my time here,
I just want to hear that from you.
to release myself.

The part way hug.. is the answer I have been searching.

Sorry for digging the old past, but those were the volume of time we spent together that far.